Creating a Self-Care Routine when You Struggle with Mental Illness

One thing that doesn't get talked about a lot in mental health because sometimes its just embarrassing is self care. I say embarrassing from experience, not trying to shame anyone. I think my therapist called it Executive Dysfunction, when you know you need to do various tasks, but just can't bring yourself to do them. For me, its usually because the concept of doing it feels overwhelming or I don't even know where to start.

Part of that comes from the illness itself, some of it comes from medication. One area that suffers the most is in self care and hygiene. I've talked to friends who struggle with this too because of their mental illness. Just the concept of getting into the shower, or shaving or whatever feels like it is too much. But yet, we feel so much better after we clean up.

I recently started a plan to tackle this in a few steps:

Break Things Up

I usually shower and trim my beard around the same time. Beard trimming takes a bit longer and is messier because of falling hair. I also recently started cutting my own hair. So my new attack on this is take care of my hair and beard one day. Then the next day, do the shower. Or vice versal. Shower and then hair and beard care.

Recently I started cutting my own hair and I mentioned this in yesterday's blog. My hair tends go grow rather thick, even in my old age. I also have a cowlick on the side of my head. So, it had gotten so long I was starting to look like Nick Nolte's mug shot.

It was right after the holidays and we were low on cash. For me to get a haircut in our area, it now costs between 25-35.00 for a men's haircut. So I took my clippers and using various attachments and cut my own hair and figured out from watching YouTube videos how to fade it. Its not perfect, but I think it looks pretty good and makes my fat face look less round.

At any rate, I felt much better and actually felts a sense of pride and accomplishment that I did it myself and didn't screw it up. The following morning I took a shower, and felt way better.

I don't have any real advice on taking a shower, get shower items that make you feel good. One thing I do is I often will use that time for a waking but guided meditation to help me relax as I go and to kind of zone my brain out so I don't feel overwhelmed by the various tasks. This all sounds a little silly maybe but I know its a struggle for me and others.

If I'm being honest this is all kinda hard to talk about and I debated even doing this blog, but I feel its important to put it out there.

Plan Small Outings

A lot of times when I don't clean up for a day or two, its because I figure I'm not going anywhere, so it doesn't really matter. So I've started planning on going places, even a trip to the store. More recently I've started using the library more. Partly since I work from home for a change of scenery, but also I've been trying to read my physical books and utilize the library services to support them instead of buying a lot of paper books that I don't have room for. Also, getting a book from the library gives me a deadline to read it, so it doesn't just lie around for two years before I touch it.

So planning little outings is my motivation to clean up and make myself presentable for public. If I sit around at home for days on end, its easy to say "Oh, I'll clean up tomorrow," and before I know it its been a few days. It should also be noted, sometimes in the shower, just letting the hot water run over you and taking deep breaths can be a relaxation technique for anxiety. A very helpful one.

People Close to you Will Thank You

I know this kind of goes without saying, But when we don't shower for a few days we start to stink. No one wants to be the one in their circle with body odor. I remember many years ago I worked at a psychiatric center. Even with the adults we had to coerce people to get cleaned up because the unit would smell really bad. Its just a good habit to get into even if you don't feel like it or don't plan on leaving the house.

I know I'm saying all this stuff, but I struggle with these things too. I know my medication often makes me tired and the idea of just getting up and going into the bathroom feels overwhelming. Once I'm there and going I feel better. I know it sounds funny to have a sense of accomplishment just from getting cleaned up for the day, but I also believe that we should celebrate every little win.

I know after I shower, cut may hair, brush my teeth and trim my beard, I feel so much better. Sometimes I want to go out somewhere just to show off that I'm now presentable even though I know no one else would notice or care. The key is, I notice and I feel good. I feel more confident and a sense of pride in myself. It's easy to feel beaten down by our illness. This is a small way we can grab a victory and boost ourself esteem. Its sounds very simple and basic, but that is the beauty of it. It's so simple, yet also feels so hard at times.

Anyway, I hope this was helpful to someone in some way. Sometimes with this blog it feels really weird putting myself out there and admitting to things I'm generally embarassed about. But in the short time I've had this blog, I realized a lot of people struggle and battle over the exact same things. So, I feel like I'm hitting a nerve in a good way for folks. I want that to continue. You may have noticed a few hyper links. Yes, those are affiliate links. I'm trying to monetize this blog so I can keep the lights on. I promise I won't over do it. If its helpful to you, feel free to click on it and shop around. I just wanted to be transparent as to what I have going on.

Thank you once again for reading. Feel free to drop a comment if this has been helpful for you. Stay safe out there and everyone keep up the good fight.